Finding The One.

WORDS ANNE LOH

THE DATING GAME
It’s Just a Date is Amiira Ruotola-Behrendt’s second book with husband, comedian Greg Behrendt, and his third. Greg’s first book – He’s Just Not That Into You – with HBO series Sex and the City co-writer Liz Tucillo, is now a major motion picture starring Jennifer Aniston, Scarlett Johansson and Ben Affleck. We chat about navigating today’s dating scene.

Greg, why do you think He’s Just Not That Into You struck such a chord?
It was the first time (at least in book form) that this information was coming from the point of view of a guy. Because that guy worked on Sex and The City, there was an element of trust with women. It didn’t hurt that Oprah [Winfrey] embraced it as well.

You also wrote It’s Called a Breakup Because It’s Broken together. Why concentrate on relationship books?
We’re both fascinated by relationships and, for whatever reason, people gravitate to us for that kind of advice.

Who is the target audience for It’s Just a Date?
Women tend to be our readers but the book is for everyone. We want people to find a greater sense of self, make better choices and change the course of their dating life.

What research did you do?
We always use our own past experiences as a jumping-off point. Luckily, we have great friends who are terrible daters who let us use their stories. We also posted a dating survey on www.gregbehrendt.com.

It’s difficult to find a soul mate. Why?
People get stuck on the idea of what love is supposed to be and what kind of package it has to come in for a person to be “soul mate” material. More often than not, what life has in store for you is way better than what you imagined.

What did you find out about the opposite sex that surprised you?
Greg: That there are more women than men. Or at least that’s how it feels.
Amiira: That women are the ones who set the bar for relationships. Men will only rise to the level you require of them.

Do men’s and women’s dating expectations differ?
As far as the current dating climate goes, in general, it seems that women expect or settle for very little and men expect the whole shebang with no strings attached.

Chase or be chased. Is that the question?
If your life is full and you’re always in motion, people won’t have any choice but to chase you. This applies to both sexes.

It’s Just a Date is published by Thorsons (distributed by HarperCollins Australia), AU$24.99, ISBN 9780007228324.

LOVE IN THE FAST LANE

HOW TO BE SINGLE

Ex-executive story editor on Sex and the City and co-writer of He’s Just Not That Into You, Liz Tuccillo’s debut novel is told from the perspective of 38-year-old single-in-Manhattan book publicist Julie Jenson, who quits her job to write a “comforting” book on how women all over the world handle the single life. But really, it’s more about how her four girlfriends straighten out theirs. Atria Books (Simon & Schuster Australia), AU$29.95, ISBN 9781921470035.

AVOIDING MR RIGHT

“Taking a man to Melbourne would be like taking a sandwich to a smorgasbord” may sound like famous last words to some, but in Peta’s mind, moving from Sydney to Melbourne and leaving her perfect boyfriend of eight months was something she had to do for her first love – working in Aboriginal affairs. Sometimes, a girl’s got to step away from Mr Right to find someone that’s even more right. Bantam Books (Random House), AU$23.95, ISBN9781863256049.